Hello.
The last two weeks has been a bit odd for us. We've been a house without
Baz Swells and we miss him dearly. Last week I didn't post a
"Five simple things" because I was just too upset to even bring myself to think of anything good that week brought. I spent most of the time from October 1-October 8 just in disbelief and grieving so incredibly much for my sweet Baz. I sort of tortured myself and would wake up in the morning, before getting out of bed, and go back through my pictures of Baz from the day he died- the moment before they injected him, after he was gone, and just cry so hard. I slept with his blanket, which is still hanging over the back of the headboard. I found a towel in the bottom of the dirty clothes basket the other day that smelled like him and I broke down again. It's painful. I was in denial for a few days that he was even gone. Sort of like a mental coping mechanism, I guess. I still miss him terribly. Literally terribly. My heart is in pain and I am waiting desperately for the veterinary office to contact me when his ashes are ready to be picked up. I want him back with us so that I can have some sort of closeness with him again. 16 years and nine months is almost two decades with your animal. Seems like he lived a long time, but to us, it just wasn't long enough.
We are getting a little better with accepting the fact that he is gone, but the pain still hangs around our house. We still break down when we all start talking about him and the things we know he would love. We will see, or feel, or smell signs of him still lingering around in some areas of the house. I found a spot near the washing machine where he had peed in the house without us knowing. If he was alive I would have taken that for granted and punished him, but now that he is gone, I didn't mind cleaning it up and I cried the whole time doing it. It's crazy how much we take little things for granted. It's just dog pee, right? Unfortunately, I won't ever clean up after him again and that's the pain that is lingering. He was a great dog, and I can't stress enough how wonderful he truly was. I promised I wouldn't make this "Friday things" about sad stuff, we really did have a good week, but if you get a moment, please read the blog post I made in honor of our lovely Baz Swells Happy
here. It's my way of letting everyone know what kind of dog he was and how he impacted our lives for almost 17 years.
We received his paw prints in the mail a few days back, and they were much needed. We are still waiting on his ashes and I hope that I will be a lot better once we get them. Slowly we've been seeing signs of him little-by-little and here-and-there. I sometimes catch myself talking to people about him in the present tense. I remind myself that he is gone and my heart breaks all over again. I miss him and I know he misses us, but even if this rainbow we saw isn't him, he would desperately want us to know he is okay and he loves us. But I believe it was him and his subtle way of saying, "I love you all and I will see you again."
Dogs' lives are too short.
Their only fault, really.
-Agnes Sligh Turnbull
So... Not sure how to transition into a normal "Friday things" post, but I will try. Since I didn't post last Friday we've done a few things over the past two weeks. Here are the things that made (the last two weeks) great!
1. Birthday
The Bean celebrated his birthday on September 30 and he turned 14. His birthday was overshadowed by the loss of Baz Swells, but we tried to make it as happy as we could. I reminded everyone that Baz was always happy no matter what and he wouldn't want us to be gloomy on such a good day. So we all bucked up and made the most of it. I even took the time to make him his favorite flavor of cake, strawberry cream. It took my mind off of things for a bit and in all honesty, we were happy.
2. Hike
The last weekend that Baz was still with us we took a hike on
Fitton Green. The hike was just a day hike, but we all, including Baz Swells, had a fun time. Baz always loved to be off of his lease and in the woods hiking with us. It bothers me so much that he was still willing to go go go, but his body gave out on him way too soon. This hike was a fun one and it is one that I am glad we got to share with him. He had a blast and it definitely goes down in our memory books for time spent with Baz before he passed. -My dad said it best shortly after we lost Baz, "They give so much and they take so much." Isn't that the truth.
3. Ducks
Our duckies, Rosey and Happy, are growing. We loved watching them change over the past few weeks. We are hoping they will be good egg layers and we can give duck eggs a go.
They were such cute ducklings and we are missing the curious, little ducks we brought home in a box. Watching them grow into bigger ducks and learning about us and the yard has been a treat too.
4. Boxes
Always have to give props to Yogi Surprise. The box above is the Lifestyle box for September. Unfortunatly, the first Lifestyle box I received was missing the book and the yoga mat spray had leaked a bit all over everything in the box. I contacted Yogi Surprise right away and they sent another one out promptly. No questions asked. I can not stress enough how great this company is. I love all of the products in each box and with us now eating more USDA Organic items we get to learn about new companies with each box. We love it!
The Jewelry box from September. I posted this one a few Friday's back, but I thought I would post again with the Lifestyle box to keep them together. You can check out the previous post on this Jewelry box
here. I wasn't too crazy about the Rawkin Raw Macaroon, but The Bean loved it, so win win.
Plus, we have really been enjoying the essential oil incense from
Auromere. They have really come in handy when dealing with our recent loss.
The Lifestyle box for October came this past Wednesday and I love it! As always, right? Such a great box filled with some wonderful items that we are going to use for sure!
The Jewelry box for October is below and I am loving the bracelet! I actually have it on right now while I type this post out.
Grab yourself a Yogi Surprise box
here and get on the mailing list for November.
5. Stowaway Cosmetics
I have been on a hunt to find some smaller, less harsh, easy to pack cosmetics and I think I found them. With our journey to being more minimal it seemed I have an overabundance of makeup that I just wasn't using. Eye makeup from five years ago, lipstick from longer than that, and eye liner is shades I would never wear. I figured it was high time for a change. I ended up bagging up almost all of my makeup that I wasn't going to use and sent it to my sister in Arkansas. I figure she could either get some use out of some of it, or let my niece play with it a bit. That was the closest I could get to recycling it and not throwing it straight in the bin.
Stowaway is a great company, or at least I like them so far. Their cosmetics come in sizes that you will actually use up and their products are made without the use of dangerous chemicals, cruelty free, gluten free, and almost 100% vegan. The best part of the company is, for every three products you use up you request of prepaid shipping label and send the empties back to be recycled. In return, Stowaway gives you $5 back for future purchases. I will update once I've used mine pictured above for awhile. If you're looking for a change in pace with your makeup routine, give them a try.
If you want to try a new recipe this weekend check out my post on Organic Ranch Potatoes
here. They are delicious! Plus, enjoy my new section at the top of the blog about USDA Organic options available. It will contain recipes that are geared around USDA Organic foods and at the bottom of the page it will show products that we recommend that are USDA Organic. I hope you take a moment and look it over.
-A quick thought: "The business of life is the acquisition of memories. In the end, that's all there is." -Mr. Carson Downton Abbey: Episode #4.4" (2013)
Have a great weekend and happy Friday the thirteenth!